Almighty Dad | A stay at home dad blog

Trevor Wilson is co-founder of Tootlee.com where their motto is, “total potential in kids”! They believe kids have many talents and gifts to give the world. Too often we hold them back. Tootlee is about letting people see how capable, gifted and talented kids really are! These amazing kids are making relevant and real contributions to our world.  Stop by and see their Tootlee kids. 

The Bookend Principle 

 by Trevor Wilson 

I believe that helping kids achieve their full potential is a huge part of parenting. Unfortunately there are so many things that can transpire to prevent this from happening. It can seem down-right impossible at times to parent in a positive way. 

In an effort to help us all parent better, I would like to offer a couple of rather simple ideas that can help. When I say simple, I mean it. But what makes simple things hard? Actually doing them! 

Okay so what is the simple idea? I call it “bookending”. Basically wrap the beginning and end of the day with fun and memories. The theory is two-part.  Here it is: 

1. What happens in the first 90 minutes of our day sets the tone for the day. The way you and your kids spend those first minutes of your day will determine the mood, momentum and success of the rest of the day. 

2. What happens an hour before and right up to bedtime is what kids remember most about the day. If you and the kids had a fun time creating smiles and memories right before they fall asleep, they will have a more positive memory of that day. 

So how can we implement this into our family’s life? Well, ultimately you have to figure that out on your own, since I don’t know your family personally. But, here is one example. When everyone wakes up, spend some time playing together. You could play tag, play soccer, run races, have a tickle time, dance to some music, or anything else that you as a family can enjoy. You want to engage the emotions with some action and create a great start to the day. It doesn’t have to take 90 minutes. If time is real short try to get in 15 minutes. 

To end the day, you want to wind it down on a positive note. It could be story time, talk time, watch the stars time, or anything else that the kids will really enjoy. Other ideas are to focus on giving them lots of positive feedback, tell them you love them and highlight their best talents. The bottom line is to create a positive end to the day. 

Now, take a moment and think about how you would have felt as a kid if your days started and ended like this. It would have made incredible childhood memories! 

Most kids get to start their day hearing words like this. “Don’t be so lazy! Hurry up, you’re late!” “Get your clothes out of the bathroom.” “Brush your teeth.” “Why isn’t your hair combed?” ”How many times do I have to remind you to empty the trash out of your backpack?” “Why can’t you get things done faster, like your sister?” I think you get the idea. 

After school, kids might hear this. “Why isn’t your room clean?” “Why isn’t your homework done?” “Don’t bother me. I’m busy.” “Hurry up, get in bed.” “Don’t come out of your room again or you’ll be sorry.” 

Whew! That’s enough to wipe me out as an adult! I’d hate having my days go like that. Those kinds of beginnings and endings would give me a pretty sad view of life. I wouldn’t feel much like trying anymore. 

It’s a good things kids are resilient, but why make them have to be? By making a few minor adjustments in how we parent and organize our day we can make a huge impact on our kids’ futures. 

Personally I’d like to know I’m helping my kids get more out of life. I’d like to know I’m making a positive difference in their lives. While more is better, even just changing how we spend 30 minutes each day could change our child’s future. And that is an investment worth making! 

Do the hard thing and make the change. Try it for a week and notice the difference. You’ll be glad you did. 

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