How to Lose Weight the Gross Way
By: Keith
Alli. That’s how to lose weight the gross way. The stuff is sold at every pharmacy and grocery store in the country. If you haven’t seen it then you haven’t been paying attention. The stuff is nasty. It’s almost January which means it’s time for some resolutions. The most popular of all resolutions are the ones having to do with weight loss. I’m a near middle aged guy. I know a thing or two about trying to stay thin and healthy when my metabolism tells me to expand. Fortunately for me I haven’t ever been tempted by a product like Alli for weight loss. Being somewhat awkward by nature the last things I need are the side effects that come associated with Alli. I prefer to lose weight the old fashioned way. No stomach stapling, meditation or weird pep talks – just exercise and good food. But, there will always be people who, for whatever reason, think they’re going to be the ones who accomplish life changing results the easy way. Of course there’s no such thing as easy when it comes to weight loss and exercise. Need proof of Alli’s grossness? You asked for it.
Side effects can include:
Gas with an oily anal discharge
Loose Stools or diarrhea
More frequent bowel movements
Hard to control bowel movements
Yes, there’s a theme there. My observation is that Alli is being sold all over the country at major stores. That means it must be pretty popular. That begs my question; do people read the packaging? What would possess someone to buy a product that essentially says you’re either going to be rushing to the bathroom all the time or you’ll just poop your pants without warning? The worst part about all of this is that all the tests done on the prescription strength version of the drug, orlistat (the active ingredient in Alli), say that the achievable weight loss over the course of a year is only 6 lbs of fat for obese people (according to the Mayo Clinic website). Alli only contains half the amount of orlistat as other, prescription strength, drugs. For 3 or 4 lbs of weight loss people are apparently willing to endure the above mentioned, and really gross, side effects. That is shocking to me. I’ve known that people throw their money away on gimmicks all along. Apparently though this is not a gimmick. You actually can lose weight with it. Just not very much and at a terrible cost. I’d frankly rather take my chances with gastric bypass than Alli.
I’m not suggesting losing weight is easy. I sympathize with people who have difficulty with their weight. Some people have a very hard time with it. Nevertheless, there are no short cuts. There are only lifestyle changes, and habits are never easy to break. Techniques that work, but which still require willpower, include drinking low or no calorie drinks, eliminating junk food, exercising, knowing how to practice moderation, how to shop and how to read nutrition labels. As parents we cannot afford to be out of shape and slow. We have to keep up with the kids. Resorting to Alli will not only not help you lose sufficient weight; it could cause a whole lot of snickering behind your back.
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Yeah. My mom tried the Alli pill. “Gas with an oily anal discharge”
She said the toilet had an oil slick in it.. HAHAHAHAHA
I know it’s nasty but it really does do that to people. I’ve researched it. I’m pretty sure it blocks the fat receptors (something similar to that) and it causes the fat to pass thru you and out the exit….
Kody, oh man! Your mom would kill you if she knew you told on her! HAHAHAHAHA
EEEEWWWW!!!!! Yeah, I’m guessing all those people who say they just don’t have time to workout probably don’t have time to sit on the crapper all day either.
Laura, LOL! That’s a pretty good observation. These people are trading productive time for crapping time! HAHAH
Kody, that is nasty! And I was about to have some dinner! Was thinking mashed potatoes and gravy, but now– maybe not….
hmm… I’ll stick with my doughy physic over oily anal discharge!
.-= Chris | Advice for Dads´s last blog ..Christmas Chaos Has Begun =-.
Chris, exactly what I was thinking. Even if I were overweight (I’m not, but if I were) I’d rather just be a little pudgy than resort to this junk!
How vile! Im not sure if this one has made it across the pond yet but Im sure it wont be long. By coincidence, I’ve just been writing a post on my ‘other’ blog about the long term side effects caused through the overuse of laxatives by people with eating disorders like anorexia and bullimia…
.-= Joanna Cake´s last blog ..HNT: 2009 Favourite =-.
That is DISGUSTING!!!!! But I can totally see that people, in desperations would do it. Probably avoiding reading that…
I’m sure Kody is correct in that it’s the extra fat passing through your system, but for only 3- 6 pounds extra? No thanks. I’d rather keep the pudge.
Mitzi. It always astounds me the things that people do out of desperation. I’m with you, I’d rather keep my little pudge.
ROFLMAO!!!!! This was spot on….I wondered as much too…ICKY!
Happy New Year my friend…to you and yours!
.-= BellaDaddy´s last blog ..I Wonder… =-.
Eew. That IS gross.
I’m with you about the old-fashioned way to get in shape. Exercise and eating healthful foods is the way to go.
P.S. Your comic at the top made me laugh.
.-= Stephanie´s last blog ..TOP 10 Blog Posts of 2009 =-.
Oily anal discharge? Seriously – can you imagine what that feels like?
I had a friend who tried Alli for about a week. She didn’t get any “discharge”, thankfully, but did find that it made her go to the bathroom too often. She stopped taking it because the bathroom breaks were too inconvenient for her.
.-= Chad´s last blog ..Losing Weight Today =-.
Chad: Yeah, I’m all for weight loss. But, oily anal discharge just isn’t worth it.
It doesn’t matter how much weight you have to lose, or how stubborn those pounds are. You can indeed lose weight if you have a simple plan to follow that will help you. God Bless