Getting in Shape After the Holidays
By: Keith
It’s all well and good to pig out over the Holidays. I do it every year. But, when the season is over and it’s time to get in shape, do you have a plan? Lots of people have plans; those plans usually involve gym memberships, fancy cloths (can’t look silly in front of the mirror you know) or other prerequisite equipment. Sometimes people get really motivated and tell themselves they’re going to run a marathon or an Iron-Man, or something like that, in the New Year. I think resolutions are great; fitness resolutions are equally great. They’re funny too. The length to which people go to get in shape is ridiculous. Watching the little hamsters on the treadmills is a great pastime of mine when I’m at the gym watching my sons’ gymnastics class. It’s so cute to see them toiling uselessly. I know the secret to getting fit. It has nothing to do with gym memberships. Resolutions? Yes. Equipment, clothing and wasted time? No.
Gym Memberships:
If you’re the kind of person who has to motivate yourself every day to go workout then a gym membership is the last thing you should get. The time needed to get a good workout at a gym is frequently about 2 hours. Between getting dressed to workout, preparing the babysitting duties, driving to the facility, actually doing the workout and driving home, you’ve wasted a good portion of your day. Single people who don’t have jobs might have that sort of time. Parents and people who work don’t. The dropout rate at gyms is phenomenal, and it’s not surprising considering how many good reasons there are to talk yourself out of going.
Germs: You’ll get sick in a gym. It’s bad enough hanging around a bunch of sweaty Neanderthals without having to touch them. But to use the same gross equipment, after it’s been insufficiently sanitized, is just a recipe for illness. Again, you’re a parent so you aren’t allowed to get sick. Another reason to skip the gym.
Expensive: Since when did getting in shape require 100 dollars a month? That’s money better spent on your kids’ cloths and food.
Fancy Home Equipment:
Let’s say you realize that gym memberships are stupid wastes of money. Still, your idea of getting fit requires a fancy piece of gym-like equipment, perhaps a treadmill. Treadmills, rowing machines, elliptical trainers and stationary bikes have several noticeable drawbacks.
They’re Expensive: You saved money on the gym membership, but you spent it all on one machine instead. Don’t you feel dumb?
You Won’t Use It: Don’t fool yourself; machines are boring under the best circumstances. They’re unbearably boring in a basement, staring at a wall. That iPod you bought to relieve yourself of the boredom is a silly investment too. More senseless expenses (seriously? A dollar per song?). How many times have you visited someone’s house and seen their treadmill being used as a coat rack?
The Problem With Running:
Jogging is a great exercise. Unfortunately people take it way to seriously. Let’s bear in mind that almost every animal on the planet runs faster than a human. There’s nothing particularly special about a person running. Yet, for some reason, every yahoo with a competitive streak thinks he looks awesome to the ladies running around town in tights. Like I said, running is great. Just don’t take it seriously.
The Clothing and Equipment Problem: I used to show up at races wearing basketball shorts and a regular t-shirt looking like I just crawled out of bed and stumbled to the starting line. Naturally everyone would think I was just running for fun. Then I’d win the race. I showed up at a 5k looking like that once and pushing a double running stroller (containing my two boys). I figured I’d still win the race so I lined up in front. The whole front row, wearing their Nike crap, yelled at me to get to the back. I told them not to worry, that there was no way I’d be in there way. I won that race by more than a minute and nobody ever passed me (under 17 minutes pushing a stroller). I don’t own any running cloths. I’ve got a pair of shoes. That’s it.
The real secret to fitness doesn’t have anything at all to do with equipment or preparation. It has everything to do with making a resolution to do something manageable with your life and getting started. You don’t need much money, time or space to get in shape. Stay tuned tomorrow for the conclusion to this piece, Executing a Successful Fitness Plan.
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Gee, I want it to happen but I don’t want to do it. I have crops to harvest!
Would have loved to see the look on their faces when you crossed the finish line (first) while pushing 2 little ones. Classic.
.-= Denise´s last blog ..I’ll Be Back On The 26th. Happy Holidays. =-.
Denise, Another reason I like looking like a slob and pushing a stroller is for the shocked look on peoples faces! Makes them feel even stupider for all their fancy equipment
Under 17 minutes pushing a double jogging stroller? You should get a metal or something! Oh, wait…you did.
Congrats. That is super inspiring.
P.S. I agree about the germs in gyms. Ick. I never have understood the appeal of those places.
.-= Stephanie´s last blog ..Midwife, OB, or Family Practitioner : how to choose a caregiver =-.
Stephanie, I actually got my picture in the paper for that one
It was three years ago, but I still talk about it like it was yesterday. Everybody has to have their little bragging moment, right? LOL
was that the race I was there for?? I remember the race director even had a little “talk” with you standing right there in the front row moments before the start! I was SO amused, knowing that you’d blow em all out of the water! I seem to remember Mely kicking some serious tail too!
I’m with you on the equipment. less is more when it comes to your “needs” and the real needs of your kids and long term investment in college funds etc. hmmm.. I could buy a bunch of running crap that costs a bundle, or I could put that towards my kids future. that’s a tough one!
Yeah, Tammy, that was the race. Most hilarious series of events in my running career. The race director has a talk with me about “not getting in the fast runners’ way” and “race manners”. I swear I tried to be patient with him
He sure felt like an ass when I he had to give me my first place trophy and my gift certificate for free shoes 
Getting a rowing machine at home and some free weights and thats all you need, it doesnt cost a thing to jog outside and although a rowing machine costs a bit to start it soon pays for itself as compared to a gym membership its actually very cheap.
Good work on the run thats awesome! Bet all the guys in their running gear felt silly at the end of the race too.
.-= James´s last blog ..Rowing Machine Good For Fitness =-.
Well its really so hard to keep fit after the holidays, I’ve made a list on the things I need done and hopefully making it through.
Precisely! we dont need fancy equipment or trainers.
Good pair of shoes,a few basic guidelines and consistency in workout… is all that one needs to get fit