Home Schooling Vs. Public Schooling
By: Keith
I spent 75 bucks buying school supplies for my two kids this year. I knew my total expenses were lower than what most parents of public schooled kids spend. My method for figuring out that I pay less is not exactly scientific. What I did was post what I spent on my facebook page with some snarky comment about how I thought I got ripped off. Then I got replies saying that, in fact, I had made out like a bandit. “Hmmm,” I said to myself. ”This needs further investigation.” And, guess what? My friends were right, and I was wrong. I did get a good deal. I bought a whole year’s worth of pencils and pens and paper and other random office sorts of supplies that the kids will need, and I spent half as much as even the most minimal of parents who buy stuff for public school (check out this article). How different are our worlds, the world of a home school parent and that of a public school parent? The only experience I have with public schools is the time I spent there; I don’t know anything from a parent’s perspective. The best I can do is reveal my own reality and wait for others to tell me how that compares with their own. I live life from a home school point of view. That makes me in the minority. But, does it make me wrong? Life really is a matter of perspective.
Schedules
I simply don’t have much of a schedule. Sure, I’ve created one of my own — it’s completely optional. If I wake up with a splitting headache then I just alter the schooling schedule to accommodate my pathetic state. The same goes for lunch, homework, and even my own work schedule. All I have to do is get it all done in the end, the order makes no difference. Yes, I have a lot of work to do, but it’s a luxury to do it all on my own time. My twin sister was looking for pre-schools this week for her sons. She said she couldn’t find one that she liked. Her reaction was not to look harder, it was to walk away, which, as far as I was concerned, was a good thing. My reaction was, “good. preschools are just daycare anyway. Who needs them?” I’m not going to go the political rout by claiming that all people who choose to work and leave their kids at preschool are doing it for good reasons. But, my opinion doesn’t matter. Whether they chose to put themselves in that situation or they didn’t, the fact remains that their lives are bound by schedules and order. The kids have to be somewhere at a certain time and parents need to be to work at 8 o’clock. Home schoolers don’t have that problem. That’s probably the biggest difference between us.
Priorities
I don’t think grades and test scores matter; I think success matters. That’s another luxury I have that other parents don’t. Parents who are not looking over their kids’ shoulders all day don’t have the comfort of knowing what their kids are learning without guideposts. Grades are intended to show parents how well kids are doing and to give kids an idea of what they need work on. Grades are used as a means to scale the schooling experience much like McDonald’s has an assembly line to churn out burgers. Without markers at every station it would be easy to lose track of what’s going on; a burger could end up abandoned under a pile of nuggets. My only priority is making sure my kids know what I’m teaching them. It can be as simple as asking them questions to probe their understanding. If they answer to my satisfaction then there is no need to belabor the process with grades. It’s reasonable to say that all parents have the same priorities; we want our kids to become successful in every sense. My advantage, or what I see as my advantage, is that I am unencumbered by a middleman. Public schools are a much needed institution; they just happen to be intermediaries between kids and parents.
Light Hearted Differences
There is some truth to the rumor that home schooled kids don’t know what time or day it is most of the time. I don’t even know what day it is without looking it up. It all goes along with scheduling. We also sometimes do class in our pajamas and do school work on the swings at the park. My kids are sometimes asked what grade they are in by other kids. They answer, “I’m in the red level,” referring to the color of the book they are working through. They don’t know what grade they are in. I know what grades they are in. They are in the 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and 4th grades. Yup, there are some subjects that they excel at and some they are right on schedule with. They might be in second grade math and 4th grade reading. Or, 1st grade science and 3rd grade social studies. It’s all over the map. They get to progress at their own rate without worrying about levels. It’s funny when I have parents come to me, and they wonder why my 2 kids are in 4 different grades. There is actually a difference between me and other home schooling parents too. 72% of home schoolers do it for religious reasons (see this survey). I don’t. I haven’t been to church in years. There is no religious teaching whatsoever going on in my house. 85% of parents (from the same survey) cited the moral fabric of public schools as a reason for home schooling. That’s also not why I’m doing it. I do it because I think I can teach better. I do it because I think I’m better. I have a huge ego — that’s it.
My Time
Because I home school I don’t have as much time for myself as I would like. I’m willing to make that sacrifice because I believe in what I’m doing. I would like to spend more time on this blog for instance. I wanted to buy a muscle car and try to fix it up (my learning experience). I also wanted to spend time writing fiction to get published. These are things that, at least for now, will have to wait. I decided, when I began home schooling, that my sacrifices are well worth the rewards I get in return. Besides, I take good care of myself; when my kids are off in college I’ll be almost 50. That’s still plenty young enough to take up new hobbies. That’s the way I see it. Dealing with my kids all day when other kids are at school can be tiring. I sometimes feel like I’m punishing myself unnecessarily, but then I snap out of it and keep trudging with a smile. I just have to have confidence in my own decision to go against the flow.
Another subject which deserves its own article concerns the social interactions of home schooled kids. Most people who are against home schooling are against it because they believe that our kids don’t get enough socialization (note the lack of evidence fallacy in this linked article). I’m preparing that article for tomorrow because I couldn’t fit it within my self imposed 1500 word limit. Stay tuned. There are indeed some fairly significant differences between the two schooling lifestyles. We home schoolers believe we’re doing the right things for our kids. We even have a bit of a snobbish attitude about it even though we shouldn’t. The fact is that public schools do the best they can provided the number of students they deal with. And, parents of public schooled kids care about their kids just as much as I care about mine. They just see the world differently, and that’s fine. Grades, schedules, priorities and my own realization about my time limitations don’t make me better, or worse. They are just the facts of my reality, and there’s no disputing that. Other people have their own which, right or wrong, they have to live with.
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I have an article on Associated Content about Homeschool Vs Public School Socialization. It has been awhile since I wrote it and I actually need to tweak a few things on it. Just don’t know how that works since they did pay me $25 to write it.
I have had some interesting, some intelligent and some STUPID comments on that article. I love the part about your having a huge ego though… LOL… You are kidding me? hee hee
I love the part you wrote about not having a set schedule as well. I have always had an event oriented schedule. The few experiences I have had with my children in private and public drove me insane mainly because I hate going by someone else’s daily, weekly, monthly and annual schedule.
With the beginning of this school year, I am totally fed up with hearing about how joyful parents are with getting rid of their kids every day so they can have time to themselves. It really just goes right through me because they have no clue as to how horribly selfish that is and they don’t understand that if their children were homeschooled, their children would not bring home pesky habits that have to be dealt with and would be much more pleasant to be around at home.
I think it is really sad that so many parents rejoice in sending their children away from them every day. They also lack understanding about family unity in a homeschool family because of how their children are not being sent off to be segregated by age levels with other kids each day.
You are just doing a great job on this blog. I really enjoy reading your entries each day! After you get enough on here, you should consider compiling this into a book for Stay At Home Parents and Stay at Home Dads in particular! If you need an editor, I would proud to help you out!
That should have being in private and public *school*. Yes.. I really DO get paid to edit for a living. LOL
Just like I always say “Whatever works for you.” Every parent is different and I think it’s important to find out what works for your family. I think it’s great that homeschooling works for you and your kids.
I on the other hand can’t wait to sign my daughter up for preschool. I know she will have a blast and I will have some much needed “time off”.
Nice article mate. Definitely admire you for homeschooling your kids although wouldn’t consider doing it myself. Just curious – is there anything you feel you are not quite qualified to teach? Have you had to study a bit extra yourself to feel like you had everything under control? Anyway, enjoyed the read.
Actually, that’s a great question. I am totally unqualified to teach math and science. For now I’m good. But, when they get a few years older and they are beyond my ability to teach in those two subjects I have plans for private tutors to fill in where I may not be qualified. I took calculus and basic science, but I’ve forgotten most of it. So, yes, they’ll need outside support at some point. Thanks for the comments everyone. I appreciate that everyone has their own way of doing things. We all want our kids to be super smart and healthy and we all have different ideas on how to get there. Anyone who is involved with their kids is tops as far as I’m concerned, public or private or home schooled. Thanks again
Hi Keith, I love your blog and all of your posts.. I will def. share these with my husband. When you mentioned not being skilled enough to teach your boys in math and science when they are older.. I wanted to tell you that in our community, and many others I am told, we have a co-op that meets once a week and it’s for parents and kids that are homeschooled. If you have a skill you share and teach a class foir the semester-no degree requiered, just knowledge, and if you don’t have a skill, you become an assistant. It works out great, because my 15 y/o got to take high school biology, and his “teacher” was amazing.. she brought in all the “supplies” for lab each week. We are still homeschooling, because we’re together, but it’s a big help that I didn’t have to do that. My younger kids pick fun classes at co-op though
You might want to google homeschool co-ops in your county? The rest of our school is done at home.. or museums too!
Jen, Thanks for visiting! I have not ever heard of homeschooling co-ops. That’s a really good idea. I have a few skills like Languages and History and English, but I will need help in the other areas. The co-op idea would be perfect because I could actually contribute AND make use of other people’s contributions. Thanks again for the visit and the comment!
Hi Keith, When I first decided to homeschool, I googled NJ homeschool (where I live) and I found that there are so many groups and events that take place during the day…while others are “in school” that we could go to. But the particular co-op we joined is great, and affordable because one parent from every family must help out in some way.